Your life is yours alone, Rise up and live it! ~Terry Goodkind

This is something I have been thinking about for a while, but I have been thinking of it even more since Kerstin made her goal.

I have never been a healthy or normal weight as an adult, so when I went to choose a goal weight I had no idea what I should be. When I was a child I was a healthy weight until I entered around 3rd grade and started becoming overweight. According to my height my bmi would be healthy between the weights 120 something and 159. I chose 150 because it would be realistic for me to get there and I wouldn’t set myself up for failure. I was not totally sure I would make it to 250, but I did. Wasn’t sure I would make it to 200, but I did! So I just wanted a realistic point to have. I figured that if I get to 150 and still feel fat, I could adjust my goal weight a little lower and stop when I felt comfortable.

I also do not want to be a low weight. Once when I was in high school and fat, my aunt once told me I would look ugly if I were skinny. Nice thing to say, hung? But I think she meant that I carry my weight well, and look like I weigh less than I do. Many people who see me think I weight 145-150 already, when I am way more than that. If I am clothed, and standing I look good and normal now.

I also do not want to set my goal weight too low because I think I can maintain a higher weight well. If I got to 120 and then couldn’t maintain it, that would not be helpful to me. So I figured that I would be able to maintain 150 easier.

So here are the things I hate about my body and would like to have look better at my goal weight.

My thunder thighs: I wish I would lose these. I get clothes that I am sure would fit around the waist but they just won’t go over my thighs…ha! On the other hand, I don’t want stick legs. My dad has chicken legs and they are veiny and  rather unflattering, especially for a man. I want strong muscular legs. If they are big and muscular, ok. But I want them to be big because of muscle and not fat!

 My Stomach: yes, standing with clothes on I am thin and you don’t see my belly but it is there! I have the V shape and I like that, but I still have fat around there to lose. I can tell it when I sit down and it seems to…spread out more. I don’t want or need abs, but I would like to be skinny sitting too!

My Back:  So all of this has been what I want to lose and it seems like I don’t care about strength, but I do! I want a strong body with sleek muscles. I want a strong back because I know it is sexy but also because people end up with alot of back problems and I want to have a strong back to avoid this.

I also want good posture because good posture makes you looks slimmer and more graceful.

Arms:  I used to hate my arms, I still kind of do. But, it might be my imagination, I think they are looking better. They look more toned and the only time I notice the flab is if I extend them out. So I am feeling confident that they will look better in the end.

I want my goal body to be…athletic and not just skinny.

I want my kitty muscles!

I think this might be very different from what I first envisioned my goal body and weight to be. When I first started out, I wanted to be skinny, I figured the lower the number the better even though I opted for 150. But now I don’t care about the number, I care about the body composition more. If I were 160 and 10 pounds were muscle, I would be just as happy.

Also most of my exercise program is targeted to sculpt my body the way I want. I know that the Pilates will help strengthen my abs and back, and that it will make me more graceful (I need to learn that! ha I’m lucky if I don’t fall down the stairs when I walk) As well as using my Swiss ball and doing Tae Bo.

On another note, my mom thinks the only way you can cook sweet potatoes/yams is in syrup and marshmallow! I thought you could cook them without these things?! I asked her what they used before marshmallow and pancake syrup existed. According to her, they got syrup from trees or from bee hives…(really?)